Watch Out for Ferrets!
by Moonrise31
Summary: Solembum gets in trouble with a local ferret. A modern, gangster ferret. :D Just R and R, okay? Please? Rated K plus.


**A/N: My first Eragon fanfic. Don't really know how well it turned out...I've been told it's strange... ^^` Oh well, this idea has been bugging me for awhile, so I let it loose! Enjoy! :D**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing from this story. Other than the ferret. And maybe the hitching post. :)**

Solembum trotted briskly around Teirm, his new home. He and Angela had just moved in, and he was eager to get the lay of the land. He twitched his nose and lazily blinked. The morning sun said it was time for taking a nap, not for walking his paws off. Unfortunately, Angela had shooed the werecat out of the shop for a day while she organized. "I don't need your sleepy bottom under my feet all the time!" the mildly annoyed witch had tsked at him. With a reluctant meow, Solembum had ventured into the city.

"Yah! Stupid cat!" The yell snapped Solembum back into reality. A red-faced man glared down at him, shaking an angry fist in the air. "You almost tripped me! Watch where you're going, idiot!"

_Who's the idiot? _Solembum thought smugly. _You're the one talking to a cat. _Indeed, the mad man was receiving weird looks from passers-by. A woman turned her son away from the spectacle and hurried away, saying, "Now then, Tred, aren't these, um, wooden sculptures more interesting?"

"That's a hitching post, mom."

"Exactly. Fascinating, isn't it?"

Solembum grinned in the cattish way of his and continued on. _Humans,_ he thought. _They are so entertaining._

The werecat caught a scent of mouse. _I am hungry,_ he decided, and turned in the direction of the scent.

The odor wafted from the very end of a dark alleyway. Thinking nothing of it, Solembum continued on.

There! The mouse was dead, but still fresh. Solembum licked his lips. _Funny how it's dead even though it's still rather young. It doesn't smell sick, either._ But stomach will always rule over the brain, and so he stepped forward and ate the morsel in one gulp.

"Yo! Whatcha problem, dude? That was my vittles, yeah?"

_What the Helgrind is a "dude?"_ Solembum blinked as a figure bounced out of the darkness.

"Ya harda hearin' o' what? Mouse was my food, my chow, and you jus' wen' an' ate it! Whatta maw, yeah?" the creature went on.

_It's a ferret. _Solembum was having a hard time processing thoughts, as the ferret continued to fill his ears with meaningless chatter.

"You jus' gonna stand there gawping' o' you gonna catch me another mouse, yeah?" The ferret stood on its hind paws, making various gestures with its front paws.

Solembum touched the agitated animal's mind. _Look, I'm sorry it was yours. I was hungry._

"Woah! Dude, whatcha do? You an alien from outa space, yeah?"

_I'm connecting with your thoughts,_ Solembum communicated irritably, _but even your mind is full of gibberish. I can't understand a word you're saying._

"Dude, jus' gimme back my mouse an' I leave ya 'lone, yeah?"

_What do you want me to do? Regurgitate it?_

"Don' wan' no jergatin', jus' want my mouse, yeah?"

_I'm sorry, but I can't help you there. Best of luck hunting another one. _Solembum turned and headed towards the busy streets once more.

"Wha? You leavin' me? Bad choice dude. Baaad choice, yeah?" the ferret spread its arms wide to express exactly how "baaad" Solembum was being. The werecat simply flicked his tail and disappeared into the crowd.

"How was your walk, Solembum?" Angela set the last herb in place.

_Oh, it was fine. Nothing interesting._ Solembum yawned. He wanted to forget the annoying ferret as soon as possible.

_CRASH! CLANG! BANG! _Solembum jerked awake. The sun was just rising, and he felt himself changing from his boy to his cat form. Angela was putting on a robe. "Something's going on downstairs," she commented. "Want to come along and see what it is?" He yawned and stretched, then followed her out the bedroom door.

The shop was in chaos. Jars of salves lay broken on the floor, having spattered all their contents liberally all over the place. Herbs were scattered and there was a hole near the front door. Angela raised her eyebrows. "Hm, and I spent all day arranging everything perfectly, too." Solembum was getting a bad feeling. He stepped into the room and a clump of mysterious roots promptly fell on his head. The werecat gave a yowl of annoyance as a sickening odor filled his nostrils.

"What's this?" Angela ignored her companion and picked up a scrap of paper by the hole. She squinted and read slowly,

"'Dude this whatcha get fer pinchin me mouse yeah.'"

Solembum padded to the hole and sniffed. A distinct ferret smell was wafting out of it. _Um, maybe something mildly interesting _did_ happen yesterday._

"Do tell." The witch waited as Solembum curled his tail and related his previous day's adventure.

Angela was quite amused that one ferret had been able to cause such a mess. "But of course, if it can talk and write, I'm sure it's no ordinary ferret. Note to self: investigate further the subject of magical weasels."

_I'll go out, so as not to disturb you,_ Solembum excused himself. He was itching to get his claws on that creature now.

"Sure, but remember," Angela called after him, "watch out for ferrets!"

**I've always wondered where Angela got her warning, "Watch out for ferrets!" so, this is how I imagined it came about. Sort of xD Please review and tell me what you think! Good or bad, all is good...I mean, well, you get it, right? :)**


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